Ties That Bind - Part Trois
Jus finished up a meal at home. Wasn’t the food that made it fulfilling. It was the company. Fixed myself a simple after-workout meal, egg white & turkey breast omellete with a side of diced veggies, toast, & fresh fruit. Both my mother & sister came home sometime during the process of getting the food from stovetop to tabletop. They both ended up joining me at the table.
What proceeded to occur was a beautiful exchange—a trading of humorous anecdotes between my sister & I, topped off with extreme barrages of sarcasm from my Mother. Quick & swift combinations of cynical comments, critical asides, & occasional jabs of just plain dumbass remarks. My Mother is as smart as she is beautiful, with sense of sarcasm to match. Her brand of acrimony is that of an acclaimed French art critic who was born & raised in the rough streets of Harlem. Basically, fine wine cynicism with a street-wise stubborn streak. Needless to say my Mom is one tough cookie. But all of these she does with Compassion. I can see now what I could not as a child. There’s a warmth, a pleasant note of Compassion being hummed amidst the firestorm of witty remarks. What makes this all the better is the way she butchers words every 5minutes or so LOL. It’s a combination that is comically lethal. We all had some good laughs today. Been a while since I shared a laugh with my Mom. Or is it just that I haven’t noticed?
We didn’t always see eye to eye. I was childish. I was selfish. But I’ve grown. So has she. In the end it was all Love. I’m glad I’m aware of it now. Glad I am no longer ignorant.
It’s safe to say that my Mother raised me. My father supported us, but my Mother raised me. Definitely a Momma’s Boy in the sense that I inherited all my finer qualities from her. I wish to give her a second chance at Romance—a chance to fall in Love with the World. There are so many things she hasn’t done. So many places she hasn’t seen. She sacrificed a lot for me. I want to return the favor. She brought me into the World. I want to bring the World to Her. I’ll be her personal tour guide.
They say behind every great Man, there is an even greater Woman. I’ve been fortunate enough to have known several great women in my Life. Out of them all, my Mom is definitely the greatest. Thank you Mom. No matter how much I fought it before, thank you for instilling in me the qualities of a Great Man. Though I’m not one yet, I will make you proud. That’s for damn sure.
I’m lucky. Been super fortunate that I’ve met many great women in my Life. Glad that I’m aware enough to realize it now. So many fine incarnations of Feminine Beauty. It’s strange & humbling to think that they still ask about Me. So many of them invested in me, even at a young age. Hell, both my elementary school Art teacher & my high school Literature teacher were like second Mothers to me. All of them taught me how to be accountable & responsible for all that spurns forth from the energy of the Feminine. Learned a lot. Hope to experience more. From Lovers, Mentors, Family & Friends. Learned to enjoy all aspects of the Feminine Essence. But above all—I’ve learned to Respect it.
James Brown said it best:
This is a Man’s World. But it would mean nothing without a woman or a girl.
~James Brown::It’s A Man’s Man’s World
This is perhaps the last of the Ties That Bind posts. Meant to be about Fam anyways. Who knows though. There could be more in the Future. Quick retrospective:
Love you Mom. Love you Fam.
Ties That Bind - I Miss You
Speakin of children—haven’t seen Family in a while. People forget how to spell correctly sometimes. They forget that Love is actually spelled T-I-M-E.
Used to babysit this kid. Miss her to pieces. They grow up so fast.
One of the more recent additions. She’ll be grown in no time. I’m scared to blink.
Workin hard as nails now. The Prospect of being a Superior Man as my compass; a Man that my future daughter & Wife can be proud of. It may be a very long ass time from now, but I have to be aware that every step I take now will be a step either towards or away from that direction. Not an issue of Good vs. Bad. Holy vs. Evil. Experience is Experience. I refuse to become a naive Father. An inept Husband. I will be a Man of superlative Strength. Family will be my backbone. My Wife as my Queen. My Children as my Fortune. Love as our Castle. The Stars will be our ceiling. The World will be our personal backyard. All fact. Not one ounce of fiction.
Ties That Bind - Part Deux
So I’m cleaning the kitchen before I headed out of the house today, my father rummaging through the fridge & fashioning himself a meal out of yesterday’s leftovers. He begins construction of an edible superstructure on a Hefty foam plate foundation, follows it up with a floor & wall framing of white rice, knocks out doors/windows & siding with one fell swoop via fried chicken, dry walls & insulates with some noodle stir fry, & tops off the majestic piece with a rooftop garden/foyer made up of nothing other than……a cinnamon roll?!?! LOLOL Sometimes in Life it’s all bout the lil things. I’m finishing up the dishes. My father stops & regards me for a brief moment, then simply says:
I miss your Mom. Life is different without her…
It’s only been around a week, eight days to be exact, since ma mère left for her Philippine excursion. As I get older I’m becoming more aware of expressions of affection such as the one my dad just put forth. I’m humbled & I’m grateful. This house wasn’t always filled with such warmth. Proof that even in the darkest of hours, the Sun’s always shining somewhere in the World. I’m glad it’s finally shining here…
Yah Dad, I miss Mom too. Love ya Mums.
I also miss Her as well. Heh, Life sure is different without Her…
>real talk—this is what i want one day, when the time is right.
food.4.thought: everything i do, will either be a step towards or
away from that vision.
The Ties That Bind
No frills. No A-list words. Just pure unadulterated rant. Rant about something, or someone rather, whom I care for very deeply…
Spent the entire day with mah dear ol’ lil Sister. Been havin quite a bit more of these brother-sister bonding moments as of late. Went out & gave her a lil tour of ze town today. I love seeing her grow-up. Felt like it was only yesterday that she learned to walk, and now she’s blossoming into a young woman. Over the years, I’ve pretty much been a lil bit of everything to her: a fun-loving, annoying & vulgar sometimes-moon-you-first-thing-in-the-morning older Brother, a gossip-happy-dammit-fine-I’ll-braid-yo-frackin-hair older Sister, supporting but annoyingly stern-jus-listen-to-me-cuz-u-know-i’m-right Father, & even a Houdini-never-see-your-face-no-more Disappearing Act. We’ve gone through cycles of affection, hate, indifference, etc. And through all this we’ve grown to become best friends. Now we’re closer than ever…
An incident occurred while we were out on the town today. Said incident forced her to grow up even more so right in front of my eyes. I won’t divulge details, but I will say that it was not a very comfortable situation to be in. Because of this incident I realize more so now than ever how pivotal my role in her Life is. I am one of the few—if not the only One—who can properly spur on her growth as an individual & as a strong independent woman. This is because out of anyone inside our household or otherwise, I know her the best. Can’t always coddle & protect Her nor can I just leave Her be. All I have to do is just be her Brother—and everything that entails. I don’t have to be Perfect. I just have to be Fearless. I sent a wish into the night sky & low & behold her Star was born (true story, i swear). She’s a dream come true…Literally. So I must treat her as such. I’m her older bro. She’s my ever growin baby sis. I Love Her to pieces. Over & out.